THE POWER OF LIMINALITY

I’m constantly surrounded by people who feel comfortable belonging to one trade or one hobby or one organisation. It certainly seems more advantageous to specialise in something  than to be a generalist.

I think I’m more of a generalist than a specialist. After exploring one skill or one hobby, I like to move on to learn other things, more so things that are entirely out of my comfort zone. That is why I’m very comfortable with Marianne Cantwell’s concept of liminality in her TED talk on The Hidden Power of Not (Always) Fitting In

Liminality is a state of in-between-ess.  

It is not being good at only one thing but being good at many things. You don’t fit into just one world or one group of people to the exclusion of others. You create your own space and bridge worlds by not limiting yourself to any one world.

Liminality is all about being comfortable in your own skin.

You are not restricted by what others think about you or what others expect of you. This gives you the freedom to be who you are and to be good at whatever you set your mind on doing. Most of all you have no fear of what people are saying to your face or behind your back. You have no fear of going to new places or trying out new things without needing to justify what you intend to do.

People say I am creative. Others have asked me what is it that I can’t do.

Believe it or not, I don’t realise it myself that I am creative or that I can do many things. I’ve always thought that anyone can be creative and can do many things given the right guidance or encouragement. I still believe so.

I attribute this artistic inclination to the spirit of liminality. It is a quest to pursue the unknown, to learn more, to think and to see things differently and to be part of this and that.

Recently, I chose to be in 3 new worlds.

World 1: Going for a retreat where everyone knows someone in the group and you are quite a stranger to all of them.

When I heard about a 3-day trip to An Grianan in County Louth organised by the Clare Irish Countrywomen’s Association, I was most curious. I had a look at the programme and decided that I should go. Just like that - no ifs, no buts. The duration and the timing of the trip suited me. Most of all I was keen on learning how to make fascinators and there was a full day dedicated to that.

I was not disappointed.  An Grianán, which means Sunny Place in Irish, is a beautiful Edwardian manor house situated on 88 acres of park with mature trees and a gentle path to the nearby sandy beach. I had a lovely en-suite room and hearty meals complete with freshly baked brown bread and yummy desserts.

Did I feel left out not being a member of the guild? Not at all because I was made to feel very welcome by the warm and friendly crowd. I went home very pleased with my new knowledge and my new friends.

World 2: One day I just woke up and told myself I must go and learn horse riding. I’ve always enjoyed going to fairs and watching show-jumping. So I called up the horse riding school and booked myself for beginner’s lessons. I was introduced to Junior, a fine stallion. I learnt how to saddle him, to hold the reins, to manoeuvre  and to trot.  I went home very pleased with my new knowledge and my new friend.

World 3: I have always been fascinated by batik art. So when I was back in Malaysia last month, I did a google search and discovered Sam Karuna Dyetik class which is a fine art batik technique that he pioneered. More than 12,000 students have benefited from Sam's skills and experience through his courses. 

Due to limited time, I could only spend half a day learning the fine art of batik painting under the tutelage of a patient master artist. It was a wonderful experience altogether and I went home happy with enough raw materials to start my foray into this new world.

So what is it about liminality that strikes a chord in me?

It is about hovering between worlds and enjoying them to the fullest.

No apologies.

THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE NEW STRAITS TIMES MALAYSIA ON 22 OCTOBER 2017. 

https://www.nst.com.my/opinion/columnists/2017/10/293564/power-liminality

HOMEWARD BOUND

My trip home to Malaysia last month has left me with many wonderful memories of who I am and why I’m proud to call myself a Malaysian. I dreaded the 13 hour flight but when the plane landed and the pilot said 'and to all Malaysians welcome home’,  my heart missed a beat.

What is Malaysia that I call home?

It is a land that boasts of many dialects and languages. 

What fascinates me most is our own ‘brand’ of spoken English that we fondly call Malaysian English. It never fails to make me smile when I listen to the concoction of different words in a sentence that might make no sense at all to a non-Malaysian.

Take for instance a father speaking to his toddler daughter . The father was carrying the little girl as they stepped on the escalator. We were standing a few steps below them when the little girl’s slipper fell off. A lady picked it up, rushed up the escalator and gave it to the father.

So the father told the little girl, “See-lah you. Just drop your slipper like that. Good thing, the nice aunty saw it and quickly- quickly gave it to me.”

The words ‘nice aunty’ really warmed my heart. In Malaysia, any older female who is not a blood relation is a sister or an aunt.  This is a mark of respect as we don’t call people who are older than us by their first name. I must admit that I enjoyed it thoroughly when even Uber drivers called me aunty.

It is a land of hospitality and generosity.

Our  short vacation was jammed packed with activities that revolved around family and friends. We went south to Johor, my home state and then to Melaka and Kuantan.  Friends separated by time and space bothered to get together to celebrate, just because we came home. 

Primary and secondary school friends treated us to sumptuous meals and gave us presents and local delicacies to bring back to Ireland.

A friend even brought us to her orchard and it was an Eden experience to be surrounded by dragon fruit, bananas, papayas, breadfruit, passion fruit and soursop. As mosquitos were swarming round, we made sure we had a good spray of mosquito repellent. The icing of the cake was when we saw weaver bird’s nests that were so intricately woven.

We also visited Tengku Mariam Primary school where I first started my formal studies. Fences and man-made structures had replaced the lush tropical foliage that once surrounded the school. We used to play hop-scotch or tag or run on the sides of the drain but I guess millennial children do not do that anymore. I remember having to recite the Rukunegara (National Principles) before 600 children during the school assembly and it was fun re-enacting the event at the exact spot beneath the flags to an empty field.

We also visited High School Batu Pahat where I did my Form 6. One of my classmates is a teacher there and we had tea in the canteen - the difference was we sat in the room where the teachers sat and not in the student area.

When we went to Melaka, we met up with my university course mates and visited the House of Museums which threw me back to the 60s and 70s when my mother used the wood stove for cooking and set her hair in curlers under the ‘big hat’. We were also treated to wonderful meals and watched others do the waltz, the swing and the rumba to  Michael Buble’s Sway.

It is a land that boasts of friendliness among complete strangers.

After Melaka we went to  Kuantan and I wanted to visit the batik centre.. I went to the tour desk to call for a taxi but another hotel guest who overheard my request offered to give me a lift since he was going there himself. After the visit, I waited for a bus but there was no bus in-sight for a long time. Again a lovely lady with very young children stopped her car and gave me a lift back to the hotel.

It is a land where you drift seamlessly into your younger self and just let your hair down with your best friend. Michael and I went for the swings, the see saw and the slide when no one was looking and chased crabs in the sand.  

So I look forward to coming back again to the land where I was born. Being home is an indescribable feeling even though it was only for 3 weeks. Somehow I even enjoyed the sun, something I never really liked before.

THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE NEW STRAITS TIMES MALAYSIA 8 OCT 2017 https://www.nst.com.my/opinion/columnists/2017/10/288630/homeward-bound