A bit of déjà vu

I was telling Michael the other day that I've been in the same situation before. Waking up, exercising, drinking my favourite brand of coffee, gardening, cooking, crafting, attending online classes or zooming with friends, walking in the park and then hitting the sack. 

The only difference between today and tomorrow is the weather. If it is raining then there's no gardening or walking in the park.

Repetition.

And this has been happening since Level 5 restrictions began and today is Day 39 and we will break free on December 1. 

My mind is going on overdrive as what I would like to do after December 1. The list of things I would like to do seems to get a little bit longer by the day.  The first thought is going as far as the new restrictions allow. If it is across county then I must arise and go.

I remember when I was a child and had to stay in bed because I was sick, I would write a long list of things I wanted to do once I got well. As with most Asian parents, my mother would put me on a very strict 'invalid diet' which meant I have to abstain from certain types of food until I got better.  For example if I had a sore throat, I wasn't allowed to eat anything deep fried. Or if I was coughing, I couldn't go near the ice cream cone. So while everyone else in the household was enjoying their fried chicken and ice cream, I would write down in my notebook under ' Things to eat when I am better' : one piece of fried chicken and one ice cream. I think that's where I learnt the power of self discipline, abstinence and delayed gratification.

We are approaching the end of yet another year, and everything seems to be happening so slowly or so fast depending on how you look at it. One thing is for sure, we can look forward to another new year, 2021, and in Facebook speak, a year that will hopefully garner more ‘Likes’ than 2020.

To me December is the beginning of cold wintry nights, shorter days and crisp air. It is also a time to slow down and take stock. And if I were a bear, I would put a sign on the entrance of my cave: HIBERNATION mode on and if you need me I’ll be inside until April. Imagine the cold cocoon and the deep sleep.

My garden is quieter and the raised beds have been dismantled to make way for a polytunnel next Spring. But beneath it all, the roots are riotous and the creatures that live in the soil are alive. I think of persistence, determination and rising up again.

As I go about putting up decorations and shopping for presents and cooking up a storm, I will take a moment to reflect on the things that matter to us. Moments that we cherish and good memories. We will remain safe and healthy throughout this season to emerge strong and energized. In the new year, we will make new plans and carry them out. So let’s say goodbye to 2020, and raise a toast to better days to come, to a brighter future and a hope. 

And if local or international borders are open again safely, we will travel from the North Pole to the South Pole, from Europe to Africa to Asia to Australasia and to the Americas and cross the Tropic of Cancer, the Equator and the Tropic of Capricorn.

A blessed Christmas and a bountiful New Year to all…………

Eat, drink and be cosy.    

I HAD A DREAM

I had a dream when I was a child. No, I had many dreams. And childhood dreams creep up on me like some Freudian subconscious voice, speaking very loudly indeed in the most unexpected moment.

When I was 6 years old, I passed a shop of 'all sorts' on the way to kindergarten. I call it a shop of 'all sorts' because you can find almost anything there - from zips to pots and pans. But the thing that caught my eye was a lovely hard plastic baby doll that wore a red cloak with a red hood. She had the sweetest smile and blue eyes as big as saucers that could blink. Her natural eyelashes would have put any falsies to shame. I saw the price tag and kept walking and wishing.

Then the final exam came. Yes, I had to sit for an exam at kindergarten level - Asians take education very seriously from a young age. I was first in a class of 36 . My father decided to reward me and so he brought me to the shop of all sorts and asked me what I wanted. I pointed to the doll, wondering if he would buy it as it was very expensive - 6 ringgit or a whole euro and 50 cents. He did and that baby doll was the first and only doll I ever had. Hugging it was very soothing indeed.

Fast forward to 4 December 2019.

I was walking along the aisles of a big toy shop. I entered the toy shop because my good friend was leaving Ireland and my heart was aching. Some people binge when their hearts ache. I enter department stores.

The only words that came into my mind were 'wow, wow, wow'. I felt like I was only three feet tall and looking up at shelf upon shelf of every toy you can ever imagine. Then like a bolt of electricity, a dream surfaced. It was clear as day and I thought I heard a cabbage patch doll crying out, 'Adopt me. Take me home'.

So I started to search for her. Maybe I was looking at the wrong aisle. A store assistant passed by and I asked him to help me locate the dark hair beauty. He looked at me as if I had two heads. He had no clue what a cabbage patch doll is. I felt very ancient indeed.

It is a very different era altogether.

Cabbage Patch Kids are a line of soft sculptured dolls that were created in 1978 . The child who owns a cabbage patch kid had to take an Oath of Adoption with the famous 14 inch doll. Each kid stands at 14 inches and carries her own birth certificate.

No one I knew had a Cabbage Patch Kid. Only children in television shows or children whose parents were surgeons. The price of one would cost you a trip to the moon and back, that was what I was told.

So, what is it with childhood dreams?

I think they are lovely especially when many years later, you can realise them. Everything is precious when there is value attached to it. The doll itself is just a doll. But it is the child's dream behind the doll that makes it precious. And to realise that dream as an adult, has set that desire in stone. The timing was perfect. The doll soothed an aching heart.

So I brought Tamara Thalia home.