Emancipation

We have just returned from a short holiday to New York and out of my 3 trips to the same city, I would say this is the best. Why? My daughter lives there. No, I didn't do the touristy stuff as I've seen what I needed to see. Yes, there were plenty of other things to do and finding unexpected treasures in the city was a bonus.

Limitations. I like the term 'mind-forg'd manacles' by William Blake. Although Blake used it to describe self imposed social and intellectual restrictions that deprive humans of experiencing nature and the true human spirit, I would like to use it to describe the circumstances, words, thoughts or expectations that shackle the human spirit. And we have many.

It is a wonderful thing to feel free. It is strange but somehow humans consciously or unconsciously put shackles on another. Be it a thought or an action. I have a doormat that reads 'PLEASE HIDE PARCELS FROM MY HUSBAND'. Maybe that's why I like to shop alone. Because one wrong word from another person who goes with you on a shopping spree takes  the joy out of shopping altogether.

It devalues the purchase.

And so I entered a craft store. That is a very dangerous place indeed. There was this lovely quilting kit that shouted loudly to my soul. I looked at it and saw the price. Then I walked away.

My daughter said, 'Mum, if you like it, buy it.'

Music to my ears.

Then I went to a flea market. That again is a very dangerous place indeed. There was this lovely Autumn teddy bear that again shouted loudly to my soul. I looked at it and told myself I have quite a few teddy bears at home. Then I walked away.

My daughter said, 'Mum, if you like it, buy it.'

I started dancing.

Because she knows. She knows where I have been all these years, putting herself, her brother and her sister before me. It is time I think of me. Now that I have lived long enough and can afford it.

Emancipation.

PLUS ONE DAYS

Some television stations have Plus One programmes which gives you another chance to watch your favourite shows an hour later. This does mean that there are people who are happy to not miss a tv show.

Now, here we go again with another 3 weeks of Level 3 restrictions throughout Ireland. A change to what shops or services can remain open, how many people you can meet at one time and how far you can travel amongst other things. Restricted movements never go down well with anyone, especially if the changes are rather sudden.

Like many others caught in the same predicament, we also had a taste of it. Nothing drastic or life threatening, just some inconvenience.

We had a holiday planned out and so we had to cancel everything. Quite a bit of a last minute cancellation but the hotel administrative staff was pretty kind and understood that the fault was neither ours nor theirs. So it was penalty free.

So what has that got to do with Plus One tv programmes?

I thought there is some similarity there. 

You know, with an active mind, you can almost draw similarities between totally diverse situations and yet everything adds up in the big picture. Michael would say, that I would start off with something at the beginning of a story, which then meander to another and then at the end everything comes together. You just don't know how it spins.

Plus One Days.

This is my new coinage. Simply put, the days that you are meant to be somewhere else, but you get to spend them at home instead.

What does that mean to me?

For a person who is mentally and socially active, it means that I get to spend such days without any plans made. No  appointments, no visits, no gatherings, no duties. 

So I get to spend extra days simply doing what I like on the spur of the moment because I haven't committed myself to doing something planned.

Plus One Days.

Sleep. Yes, extra hours on the bed hugging my pillows. (I have many - different shapes and sizes) Who wants to draw the curtains to let the sunshine in? Who wants to crawl out of the comforter with the hot water bottle next to you? Who wants to get out of comfy, snuggly fleece-lined jammies?

Plus One Days

Music. Yes, listening to On My Way by Alan Walker, Sabrina Carpenter and Farruko. The song, the voice, the video, the lyrics!!

So take aim and fire away...I've never been so wide awake...The blood moon is on the rise, The fire burning in my eyes....And I'm on my way

Reminds me of the shower scene in Flash dance so many years ago. Where Alex Owens (Jennifer Beals) was a welder who wanted to become a dancer, but she represented anyone with a dream.

 I can be 16, I can be 90, but the spirit is still the same. Freedom, emancipation, unfettered, unleashed. No boundaries. To be Myself.

Plus One Days

Write and Read. Exactly. Write my blog. Write my letters. Write my cards. And read. Yes, read that magazine, read that book, read that letter....again.

Plus One Days

Appreciate. Count the moments. The moments I have lived, through pain and joy. The moments that seem to be forever. The moments that are fleeting. The moments when I am surrounded by the people I love. The moments when I am surrounded by myself, me, mine. I am very comfortable in my own skin. I see the ME in the colours, the sounds, the heat, the cold. I feel the damp of the fallen leaves, brown and almost brittle. 

Plus One Days.

The joy of NOW.

I'M GROWING NEW BRAIN CELLS

Every time I meet a new person, the inevitable question comes out....'Now, where do you work?'

The answer in my head is, 'I'm growing new brain cells in the lab of my brain and I'm making great progress.'

I do believe that every time I learn something new, react positively to something negative or step out of my comfort zone, I'm growing neurons. Two big words for today are neurogenesis - the creation of new neurons and  neuroplasticity - the ability of the brain and nervous system to remodel in response to new information based on experiences, behaviour, emotions or injury.

Just the other day, we visited the Hill of Uisneach. It was our second time there, the first time having missed the tour. So with knowledge readily shared by our most wonderful guide, Justin, who is an archaeologist, I felt so privileged to walk on the grounds that the great and the mighty have trodden. I came away with two books and also several links to research more into the wonders of Ireland's sacred past. I can never say enough about reading. My kindle, books and writings are always on my bedside table.

My love for learning propels me forward. It becomes a challenge for me to find a way when there seems to be no way. That's where ideas lead to creativity and voila! something beautiful comes out of it.

Take for instance the time I was running to several florists in search of a dry oasis ring to make a wreath, using the garden flowers that I have dried. Sure, they have it over at Amazon and all but to actually order one and get it delivered doesn't justify the monetary outlay. So when I saw a 12 inch aluminium pie plate that cost a fraction of the price of the aforesaid Amazon ring, my brain went into overdrive. I started to grow neurons and was mighty pleased with the result. The secret is of course to be pleased with everything you have tried and not to beat yourself black and blue over something that you have spent hours on.

A friend once shared with me the story of the measuring tape. If we always think whatever we do is never good enough, perhaps we have been using the wrong measuring tape. The solution is to ditch that measuring tape and get a new one!

I know it is scary to try new things. But if you don't try, you will never know. The thing is if it works, you are happy. If it doesn't, there is always the bin, and no one has to know.

At times, I yearn for food that I love but is not readily available over here in Ireland. Recently, I was imagining dorayaki (japanese round pancakes with red bean filling) flying around me like spaceships. So I know I had to make some and so I did. A GOOGLE search on methods of freezing them came to nought so I thought of a practical way to do so, based on my experience with freezing food, and hey presto, the last time I re-heated a frozen dorayaki on a cool autumnal evening, it tasted like heaven.

I think the worst thing you can do to yourself is to build walls around your brain.

In the lyrics of 'I am a rock' we hear the lines ................

I've built walls

A fortress deep and mighty
That none may penetrate
I have no need of friendship, friendship causes pain
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain
I am a rock
I am an island

When we start to build walls around our brains, we self destruct. Walls need to come down. For every bad relationship, there are plenty of good ones. For every wrong decision made, there are better ones ahead. 

The brain is as old as you want it to be. Feed it and it grows. Build walls around it and you are stuck. 

So, I'm quite happy growing neurons in the lab of my brain.

FREEDOM TO DREAM

When I’ve been away a few days, the first thing I’d do when I come home is to clean the house. I’ll give every corner a good dusting and mopping.

There was a time when I decided to clean the bird cage. I have always liked birds.

Birds symbolise transition or awakening. Wilbur Wright, the father of aviation said, ‘No bird soars in a calm’. It is about confronting fears and making circumstances work for you. Soaring birds take advantage of thermals and updrafts by flying in a circle. The rising air carries them higher and higher in a spiral. Birds that wish to stay aloft without flapping in normal wind usually fly into the wind for lift.

I had two budgies - one yellow female and one blue male. They were most delightful and they chirped merrily every morning. After cleaning the cage, I went to bed. The next day was one filled with anxiety when I saw that the cage was empty and the door was open. I had either forgotten to latch it or the budgies were so smart as to figure out how to open the cage.

Even though I had kept them as pets for years, the allure of freedom was too tempting.

What is it about the search for freedom that every generation gravitates towards?

Jean-Jacques Rousseau in his immensely powerful treatise ‘The Social Contract’ says,

‘Man is born free, and everywhere he is in chains.’ Maybe that is what prompts every human to pursue happiness. No holds barred. Unhampered.

In freedom is a perceived higher quality of life. A life that is better than what was before. A life that is different from what we see around us. A life that is different from others.

Freedom is spun from a dream that chases after a vision. For some, dreams remain as dreams because it is safe to dream. We can be in the here and now and yet dream of being somewhere else. The only struggle is within which others cannot see.

Freedom is about taking that step towards the unknown in the hope of achieving something more. Freedom is the choice we make and the responsibility we shoulder. Freedom is being brave.

Vanuatu is an island paradise in the South Pacific. For 45 year old Nigasau who lives there it is all about freedom. He says he is the boss there and he can do what he wants and he can get anything from the sea. In an interview on BBC’s Earth Natural Wonders - Surviving with Animals, Nigasau says, ‘It’s free.’

Albert Hammond’s ‘Free Electric Band’ used to unlock a stream of unfettered dreams in the teenage me. It all sounded so wonderful to leave the conventional path of studies and a career ahead of me, only to pursue music and to live on bread and water with ’a guitar in my hand’. Teenagers crave for freedom and I wanted to be part of Hammond’s free spirited happiness. It sounded like an over the moon experience.

Listening to the lyrics many many years after I had trodden on the conventional path of studies and pursued a lovely career, made me laugh. I was extremely thankful that I  did not give it up for music and the free electric band. They say that hindsight is 20/20 vision.

Uncle Ben Parker in Spiderman says with great power comes great responsibility.  

I would like to think that with great freedom comes great responsibility. I believe in being free to dream and to realise the vision at all costs. I am not talking about irresponsibility, whims. fancies and wild dreams. I am talking about that dream that we hold dear. I would normally give myself a time frame to realise that dream and face the uncertainty. No ifs, no buts.

The budgies never came back and I never kept a bird as a pet again.

THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PRINTED IN THE NEW STRAITS TIMES MALAYSIA ON 24 MARCH 2018 https://www.nst.com.my/opinion/columnists/2018/03/349048/freedom-dream