THANKSGIVING

I can't believe that another year is almost gone. Not much difference from 2020 except that I've got  more accustomed to certain practices: mask wearing , social distancing, queuing up for vaccines, more handwashing, avoiding crowds and generally just being careful.

This year is slightly better as we managed to travel beyond our county and visited some very lovely places. Wicklow National Park is stunning. The coast of Kerry is magical. Beehive huts and standing stones are my passion. Not forgetting lighthouses which always strike a chord within me. I would say Malin head is the tops.

 

I've also managed to enrol for art classes and I took to them like a duck to water. I've always liked drawing and everything else that my fingers do. 

Then just recently a group of us ladies from Clare completed a quilt for charity, showcasing 60 landmarks in Clare. The quilt will be hung at Shannon Airport Departure lounge soon.

If I were to summarise the year in just one word, it would be being THANKFUL.  Just last Tuesday, I woke up with a terrible pain in my stomach at 4 am. Having had gastritis before during my office days, I thought it would pass. But boy, was I wrong. The pain was relentless. Wave after wave of excruciating agony. I threw up 5 times and tossed and turned in bed to get the 'right' position to lessen the pain, all to no avail.

 

As a last resort, we went to the Limerick Hospital. Somehow the journey seemed never ending and I threw up again in the car.   

 

Praise God there were not many people there and almost immediately I was wheeled in on a trolley bed. The Pakistani lady doctor was extremely kind and attentive. In fact she was happy to tell me she had visited Malaysia before and loved it. The nurses too were reassuring and there was not one cross word heard. 

I knew I was in fine hands.   

                                                                                  

So as I lay on the bed waiting for this and that test to be done, every decade of my life flashed before me. Good times, sad times. There was one common denominator though. 

GOD. 

 

In every decade He was there - the 7 year old child with very simple faith, the university student questioning God because suddenly she was overwhelmed by the worlds of  Yeats, Kafka and Thomas Hardy, the mother in anguish over her young children, the associate professor who took to the stage to share her research .

 

And now there I was lying on the trolley bed still needing and trusting God. The only difference was I was ready to meet my Maker. I knew I had lived my life and there was no bucket list.

 

But God had other plans and I was discharged. Because I was still weak, I had to cancel a number of appointments that I had made earlier. One of them was meeting up with my friend Carrie for coffee in Quigleys cafe Nenagh. I texted her and asked whether I could see her on Friday instead.

 

I brought a pumpkin for her from my plot because I knew she would love to make delicious stuff out of it. While we were chatting, a couple approached us and asked where I bought the pumpkin from. I said I planted it in our Killaloe/Ballina community garden. Her accent sounded like American or Canadian.

I know what it is like to miss certain festivals or food from home. I remember Kevin Lim giving me a mooncake shortly after he had returned from Malaysia. It was just a mooncake, but it was more than a mooncake. It tasted like home.

 

So I asked her would she like one, as I still have one more at home. The rest is history and I hope she will bake plenty of yummy pumpkin pies....

 

It was a Kairos moment. A tipping point or a kairos moment is usually discovered behind the scenes of an ordinary day. 

 

I am going to trust God for tomorrow.  

 

For 2022. 

 

For our days ahead for as long as we live, we will rejoice in the faithfulness and the goodness of God.

 

                                                               Have a Blessed Christmas!

 

 

 

 

FROSTY DAYS

 

On the way to Dublin. He is driving. Can I have a fruit? He says. She peels the fruit and hands it to him. He eats it and hands her the peel which she automatically puts into an empty paper cup that once had piping hot glorious latte.  No words exchanged. Yet it is pretty symbiotic.

This is what I like. Peaceful and stress free and a lot of good stuff in between as the tyre hits the road.

I like to try things once, Sometimes just for fun and sometimes as a challenge. Now that Christmas is around the corner, there are plenty of craft fairs around .

There was a time when I had wants. Things admired, things desired. But there are not many things left in window displays or stalls that I would want to bring home anymore. I am content.

But it is still nice to browse and be inspired to make something new.

I had an indoor craft stall in 2013, just to see what it was like. It was quite an experience and I made a tidy sum. But I don't see myself doing it again in the near future because I like new experiences and before we know it, today has become yesterday. The ticking of the clock.

So I've made a number of artsy bits for friends instead. I find so much joy in giving. People remember givers with a smile in their hearts. I wonder how many homes have something that I made.

 

 

The days are certainly getting colder and shorter. The garden takes care of itself and the winter cabbages are flourishing. There's this occasional caterpillar that is feasting on the leaves. Very baffling indeed, How can it still be alive when temperatures drop? I suspect he must be wearing a warm red coat and shoes to match.

We've put out a lot of food for the wild birds and it is such a delight to see them. I don't know the names of some birds so it is handy to have a bird identification app. on the phone. It is with much joy to see a robin pecking seed from a swing that I made.

For me, the natural inclination at this time of the year is to hibernate. Who likes to be padded up like a Michelin man and brave the icy winds? I must convince the mind  that  as long as I am able, I must get out and do something. And I am thankful that there are so many free hobby classes to go for.

So as the year draws close , I look forward to hauling the Christmas tree home and putting up the lights. Most of all, I look forward to living another day, another month and another year with the ones that I love.

 

CROSS THE BRIDGE

 

It is certainly getting colder now and the air is crisp and fresh even as I write this. Although I like sunny days and lush vegetation, I must admit every season has its beauty. 

It is a strange thing but I find myself forgetting about what winter is like when it is summer and vice versa. Travelling from Malin Head in the North to Mizen Head in the South,  we’ve taken every opportunity to visit little towns and villages not often featured on the tourist map. Ireland is indeed very beautiful.  Both peaceful and wild. Her people both taciturn and friendly.

So with the change in the weather I'm naturally drawn to different activities.

In Spring I would be very busy in the garden. Come summer it is just relaxing outdoors. Autumn means harvesting and watching the leaves changing colours and Winter certainly mean slowing down.

Autumn and Winter also mean craft time. 

Automatically I gravitate towards keeping my hands busy with the sewing machine, the scissors or the hammer. I have to purposefully take short breaks or else I'll be glued to the crafting table.

The thing is I have a lot of stash accumulated over the years. All kinds of fabrics or mosaic tiles or paints. I refuse to limit myself to only one type of craft. I tell myself that I enjoy the process of making and it is always a delight to see how things turn out. The best part is there is no pressure in selling the products and there is no time line.  I like to give handmade stuff to friends and family members who appreciate them.

Getting back

The process of getting back to a sense of normality. The process of connecting with family far and near. It takes a little effort as my children are scattered in places with different time zones. I even have to set my alarm clock to remind myself when I should call or when they are calling. But it is such a joy to see and hear them in real time - telling me of their latest escapades, their gadgets, and what they just had for supper.

And child hood friends are such a fun bunch when we connect over zoom. We talk about anything and everything, as if 10,894 km apart, does not exist.

The baby steps we take, stepping into cafes armed with masks and Covid certs. The fear we feel when a person nearby coughs or sneezes. But with each careful step forward, we become bolder. I have not flown out of the country for almost two years now and we have decided to spend Christmas in Madrid. I’m having butterflies in my stomach thinking about it.

One thing is for sure. We must do the things we have done before the pandemic or do the things we have not tried yet. We must cross the bridge.

I LIKE THE NOW

A normal day will begin like this. If my alarm is not set for an appointment, I must have a lie in. I am allergic to mornings and I managed to find a sweatshirt that mirrors my inclinations.

After a quick breakfast, I will twiddle my thumbs and say, what are our plans for the day?

Go out.

But where?

Anywhere that the car will take us. For the moment. Until it is safe enough to fly.

So that's the modus operandi. Two people, very much in love with no pressing cares, on the road to no where.  

Just looking out of the car window, I see the beautiful picture of now. Cows grazing in the fields. Leaves turning orange and brown and red. 

 

And if I wind down the window I can taste the crisp fresh air even. Now I know why dogs love to stick their heads out of the window.

I like the now.

But to get to the now, we have had our  fair share of walls - some broken through, some yet to be broken. 

Walls of anxiety and pain - physical or emotional - delibitating in one way or another and we wish the pain would instantaneously go away. But most times it takes a while, and sometimes a very long time. And we are overwhelmed. 

The days are getting colder. My vegetables are not growing as robustly as before when there was plenty of  sunlight. The upside however is I have less slugs and snails to contend with.

I can choose to lament over the shorter days ahead or I can choose to be thankful that there won't be a famine in the home because the harvest has been great.

So, there's nothing better than what we have now. Because tomorrow has cares of its own.

INDEPENDENCE DAY

 JULY 4th -  American Independence Day. 

This day resonates with me. I can relate to it and it evokes a feeling of familiarity within me. It makes me think of perhaps the most important decision I have made in my life. It is the day I landed in Ireland with Mike and Audrey, the day we decided to make Ireland home.

'You are brave' - my friend said. I have left my job, my country, my friends, my church and most painfully my two older children behind because they were in the midst of their tertiary studies.

I don't know if I had made a brave decision but I do know that I had made a very difficult decision. In fact I think most people would not have made that decision. Who would want to give up familiarity for something unknown? Who would want to give up what had been tried and tested for something like a hypothesis? 

But I do know one thing - that is I do not want to live with regrets. Alfred Lord Tennyson said, 'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.' 

At best, I would paint a new and wonderful life on a different canvas. At worst, I would pack my bags and go home. I am not one given to impulsive decisions. Like every other decision, I think in a linear way. A = B = C = D. If things do not go forward in a good way, then I will go back to the very beginning (A) and start again. I am not the type to mull over yesterday's unhappiness.

'You are running away' - another person said. The fight or flight theory. Was I running away? NO.

I told her, take the story of the Israelites under years of slavery in Egypt. When God opened the Red Sea for them, were they running away? Or were they running towards the Promised Land?

One thing I know.

If we are faithful in our worship to God, He is faithful.

'Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake?' (Luke 11:11) God is faithful and He is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us. (Eph 3:20)

I see the faithfulness of God being played out again and again in my life and in my children's lives. Mothers will know how much our children's happiness and well being mean to us.

Sonya my eldest will soon be flying to the Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Centre, New York City. She is going for a fellowship in oncology on an Irish scholarship. It is a period of training in a different country for experience in the process of being a consultant.

This is not an overnight achievement but years of perseverance, prayer, hope and tears - both mother and daughter. It is amazing to see how caring individuals helped to ease certain technical hiccups because of the lockdown when offices and embassies are closed for long periods of time. We are overwhelmed and grateful.

Would Sonya be where she is if she had not come to Ireland? I don't know. But I can say she is happy where she is. She is blessed.

Sam, my only begotten son has experienced the miraculous hand of God time and again. When very challenging situations arose both job and health wise, God provided. In our limited minds, we are devastated and cry out when everything looks impossible. But miracles happen. Would Sam be where he is if he had come to Ireland? I don't know. But I can say he is happy where he is. He is blessed.

Audrey has made great strides in both her studies and her present position in HR in Dublin Airport. She finds herself well-liked by her colleagues and bosses and being happy in her job is an added bonus. Would Audrey be where she is if she had not come to Ireland? I don't know. But I can say she is happy where she is. She is blessed.

JULY 4th - American Independence Day.

This day resonates with me.

OUR INDEPENDENCE DAY.

The year was 2010.

It has been 11 years since.

Michael and I are still very much in love.

No regrets.

THE FOUR SEASONS (Le quattro stagioni)

 

Part 1: SUMMER

The Four Seasons (Italian: Le quattro stagioni) is a set of four violin concertos by Antonio Vivaldi . Composed in 1723, The Four Seasons is Vivaldi's best-known work, and is among the most popular pieces of Baroque music. The texture of each concerto is varied, each resembling its respective season. For example, "Winter" is peppered with silvery staccato notes from the high strings, calling to mind icy rain, whereas "Summer" evokes a thunderstorm in its final movement, which is why the said movement is often dubbed 'Storm'.

Let no one despise your youth but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit,in faith, in purity.

I Timothy 4:12

A thunderstorm, a cloud burst, summer indeed is life itself. As I sat at the dining table, a wooden one laminated with formica in the little town of Batu Pahat, I knew I was there not to eat, but to listen. I can’t remember whether it was a blackboard because I don’t think we had a blackboard, but there in front of me the teacher stood, chalk in one hand a long ruler in the other. I was 6 and the teacher was my sister, two years older than me, with a wealth of two whole years of knowledge more than me, and therefore was qualified to be my teacher. Simple fun, but there in lay the first foundation stone of the process of teaching and learning.

Was teaching ever my first choice? Honestly, no. I’ve always had a penchant for stylish clothes with matching handbags and shoes and even umbrellas for that occasional shower. As far as I could remember, stylish teachers who coordinated their clothes with handbags, shoes and umbrellas were few and far between. Definitely a public relations officer would be more appropriate for my make-up. A journalist would be even more ideal given my added passion for writing.

So I trudged along through my school days. I could remember the best and the worst of teachers – teachers who cared and teachers who were lazy and made cutting remarks to hurt impressionable minds. The latter I vowed never to emulate.

But God’s hand has always been upon me. After graduating from university, I was given a desk job because I was a Public Services Department Scholar. Right from the first month, I knew I had to get out or die sitting in a fancy office. I was bursting with creativity and non-conformist ideas which found no release behind a desk. I had to flee out of Egypt and enrolling for a diploma course in teaching was Canaan to me.

So I was thrust into the world of teaching, not by choice, but by circumstances. Having upheld the motto of excelling in whatever I do for God, I put my heart into the heart of teaching.

When the diploma course ended, the next hurdle was naturally the much dreaded word ‘posting’. The thought of being flung to the outback and the most remote area sent shivers down my spine and God spared me that ordeal and I was posted to a town school.

Armed with flannel boards and hand drawn charts, most of which remained with me for years until all the colours had faded and they were no longer recognisable, I could hear my students thinking aloud as they wondered who the clown was. Undaunted, I embraced thinking out of the box concepts in my teaching, but to my horror, I received comments like “new broom sweeps clean”, “see how long she’ll last” and “give her all the worst classes and her enthusiasm will fly out of the window”. Welcome to the world of reality.

But I knew the school walls could not contain me. After seven months, I took the first train out to attend a job interview at the then Institut Teknologi MARA(ITM). I remembered praying very hard on the train, “Lord, let this be a one way ticket out. If I remain here, my creativity and ingenuity will suffocate and I’ll probably never get married because all the good ones have been taken.” No mincing of words. God heard that prayer and I got the job at ITM.

 

Part 2: AUTUMN

Delight yourself also in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

John Keats in his Ode to Autumn described the season as filled with images of fruitfulness. Indeed my years in the classrooms of Universiti Teknologi MARA Shah Alam, Segamat, Dungun and Puncak Perdana were immensely fulfilling. Nothing beats enjoying teaching itself and having your students appreciate what you do is added bonus. I told myself if I can win over 80% of my students’ hearts and motivate them to become better individuals, I would be happy enough.

One word I believe describes my lessons – fun. Most of all, I wanted to break boundaries – to be a teacher, a mentor, a disciplinarian and a friend. Thus students came to class eager for the day’s dosage of knowledge. It was not uncommon for them to ask, “Ma’am what will we do today?” the students who had been with me for a few weeks knew that they could never predict what I had up my sleeve for the day.

I told them, “Let’s do a Mandala.”

“A what?” they queried.

Madonna has her Kabbala and we know Nelson Mandela but most of us do not know that a Mandala is actually a Tibetan word for wheel. I had carefully cut out big circles from mahjong paper the night before and divided each circle into 8 portions. Organising the students into groups of 8, each student had 1/8 of the Mandala to work with.

“Now draw out what tomorrow’s world will be like” I challenged them.

“Ma’am, this is so fun. I haven’t drawn since I was a kid.”

Once each student had completed his section, the group pieced them together to form a wheel. Presentations on varied themes evolved: Pollution, Save the World, Recycling and so on.

Teaching is not only whiteboard and power point. Unless we reach out to the students, they will not know that there’s someone who cares. A teacher will stagnate if he just goes to school to teach and then goes home. I found reading and writing enhanced my teaching and enlarged my professional expertise. To-date, I’ve written 22 books, contributed over 300 articles to newspapers and journals, and presented papers and such in 16 international cities.

But who is my source of strength?

It is God who is my timekeeper and my encourager. It is He who reminds me that every opportunity, every good gift and every blessing comes from Him alone.

Part 3: WINTER

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and He delights in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; For the Lord upholds him with his hand.

(Psalms 37:23)

If you are a frisky teenager, winter evokes images of snowmen, snow angels, skiing and snow balls. But pushing into my more senior years, I don’t particularly like winter because it gets dark early and strong winds blow straight into the bones. Winter heralds a big change in the weather. And so began big changes in my life. I ventured into the world of public administration and public relations, my first love.

Like a fairy tale, I received a letter from Datuk Mustapha Muhammad, the then Minister of Higher Education.  A hardworking and brilliant minister, he took a personal interest in the writings of academics especially contributions to the media. A few of us writers met up with the minister at the KLIA Pan Pacific. The lunch was delicious but being invited to such an occasion was tastier.

Sometimes we ask for change and yet when change comes we miss it because we ask too many questions or are afraid to grab it. I always believe that God has a plan destined for us. A journey for us to take. I was like Anastassia (in the animation of the same name) who stood at the crossroads not knowing whether to move on to St Petersburg to claim her rightful station in life or to go back to the village. I had to make a move, so I asked the minister whether I could join him at the Ministry of Higher Education for a season. He answered, “yes”.

It was that simple but I knew that unless it was the Hand of God, nothing could pave the way for me to be seconded to another office. A brand new experience – I was given a grand office and all the perks that came with the post. I had the opportunity to serve under three wonderful immediate bosses and I had a taste of the private education department, the international student department and the leadership training department.

But with power and fame, came envy, insidiousness and malice among those who plotted against me. I knew I had to diligently seek God’s counsel daily. While some may grumble that Putrajaya was too far away to commute, I preferred to see driving time as a blessing because I could commune with God, undisturbed, while driving. Communicating with God on the way to work daily set the day right. The angels went before me to set straight the path and to quash the murmurings of my enemies.

"Now is the winter of our discontent". These are the opening words of Shakespeare’s play King Richard III (Act 1. Sc. 1: 1-4) to show the playwright's view of the state of the English nation during the Wars of the Roses. It is that shudder of realisation, the one that tells you that something is horribly wrong and evil doers escape unpunished yet.

But then again winter reminds me of Christmas. And with Christmas there is hope when we place our lives in the hands of a loving God, a God who overlooks our weaknesses, heals our wounds, defends the innocent and vindicates.

So what did I learn during my stint at the Ministry?

§  That God places and displaces Kings. That while we hope to be like Nehemiah and rebuild walls, there are also many Sanballat, Geshem and Tobiah ready to cause mischief and to hurt.

§  That God reigns supreme. If he had brought me into the Ministry, there was a purpose why he did it. It was the friendships built during that stint (from those in high places to clerical and security staff). Those who tugged at my heartstrings when it was time for me to leave the place.

§  That God will put right all the injustices if we bother to fast and pray, stand in the gap and tear down the strongholds of wickedness and corruption.

 

Part 4: SPRING

Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone, but if it dies, it produces much grain

John 12:32

I look up at Thoor Ballylee, the Tower House belonging to William Butler Yeats. Nearby at Coole Lake, white swans gracefully swim with cygnets in tow. The air is fresh and crisp. Hundred year old trees line the countryside road, and the smell of oven baked soda bread from someone’s kitchen fills the air. Wild daisies throng the road and fields of lavender overwhelm me. The images seem to jump up from an Enid Blyton story book or a movie like P.S. I love you.

Yes, I am in Ireland.

I have decided to move on from a place I called home for half a century to my new home for the next 50 years or more. The day I handed in my optional retirement papers was the best day of my working life. Close friends screamed, “You are too young” and “What a loss to Malaysia” and my students cried “UiTM will die without you”.

All too often we are caught in the mire of what our society or culture dictates. Is it that necessary that your child gets all distinctions in a public examination? Do we spend most of our time ferrying our children to the tuition centre, the ballet school, the gym, the art class……..just to get a ‘head start’? What about ourselves as we slog day and night to make ends meet and enough is never enough? When the pay becomes that good, are we willing to let go and take time to enjoy quality life with half the pay?

I believe that we only live once. At every turn of our lives, we should pause and take stock. What have we done, are we happy, is there more to do?

Now I can go back to my basic instincts – to paint, to read, to sew, to do all the little things that I like and most of all to smell the flowers. Like Joseph who was sold as a slave to Egypt only to be promoted to become the Prime Minister by the Pharaoh, I believe in long term planning. God will always honour the ant that works hard in summer, the faithful who tithes, the child who perseveres. In the end, God’s glory will shine when you commit your heart, your ways and your plans to him.

I have climbed the high tower of Yeat’s house and surveyed the terrain of my life and remember how good God has been to me. As I reflect upon the challenges that I went through and the insurmountable blessings that I have received, I can only thank my Father who keeps His part of the Covenant: the part of Abba Father. Ultimately, in the midst of the beauty of the universe and the constellations, God formed us right in the womb itself. How much loved are we by this magnificent God.

A seed has to die to be reborn. In many ways, our characters have to be moulded, the incongruous parts chipped away by the master sculptor. I am not a finished product but I can see that the shoots of peonies that I’ve  planted are beginning to sprout. It is spring again and new life has begun. Like Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World, I embrace my new life that my Father has given me.

In the meantime, I will continue perfecting the art of frying sausages and hopefully catch a leprachaun.

 

 

 

APRIL IS MY MONTH

 

April is my month. I claim it as my own for the very reason that my birthday falls within this month. Well, many significant things happened in April in the year I was born.  

 1. The first seven American astronauts selected from 110 candidates.                                       2. Corvette Stingray was introduced.                                                                                             3. Frank Lloyd Wright died at 91                                                                                           4. Juha Kankkunen, Finnish rally car driver and four time world champion was born.             5. The first photograph of a falling meteorite was taken in Pribram, Czechoslovakia.   6.  Japan's Crown Prince Akihito married Michiko Shōda in a 15-minute Shinto ceremony,         at 10:00 a.m. in Tokyo. She was the first commoner to marry into the Imperial House of Japan. 

It is interesting how things have evolved. Once there were goals and targets. Now there are good memories and quiet resolution. Once there were bucket lists and deadlines and dreams. Now the hamster running on the wheel can  go to the beach and enjoy the view. I don't have to prove anything because I don't need to prove.

And I have God to thank for everything that I have. The things that matter: family, health, friends - the list is not exhaustive. The time that I have: hours and days to do what I enjoy with no pressure or expectation to perform. The space that I have: to breathe, to savour and to explore. The people that I will die for: my husband and my children.

Individualistic perspectives and attitudes have metamorphosed into a kinder and more compassionate outlook on life. Hard borders have blurred and eased. There is a difference between a rock and a pebble in a stream. Over time, the transport of pebbles in a stream causes them to collide and rub against one another and the stream bed, and the resulting abrasion produces the familiar smooth and rounded shape.

Catherine gave me a pot of shamrock yesterday. It amazes me how she remembered to bring me a pot, I had forgotten that I mentioned it the month before. A small and unassuming plant that made its way to become Ireland's national symbol. Like everything else, I started in a small way but now my world has expanded, exploded even to embrace so many new experiences, so much life. 

I go to bed excited about seeing the sun tomorrow. I wake up with a spirit to appreciate my surroundings. I choose to see the beauty and not the dross. Small things that bring joy like the tulips in the garden and home cooked food on the table.

Who did I meet yesterday? Who will I meet today? Sharing of thoughts, sharing of ideas, sharing of hearts.

Life touching lives. 

That's what matters to me. 

MARCH ON MARCH!

 

It has been a year since we went into lockdown and what started as a very strange phenomenon in the beginning has become rather ‘normal’ to me. It is strange how we adapt. Of course I still think of the ‘good old days’ when we could just go gallivanting across continents and oceans. But being a homebody as well, I have no lack of wonderful things to do at home. Believe it or not, I go to bed at night excited about what I am going to do tomorrow! And I am happy that we travelled much when we could travel.

Now that the days are longer, there are so many fun things to do in the garden as well. While the outside weather may vary from rain to hailstones, the inside temperature of the green house and polytunnel remains rather constant and that is a real bonus. Extra touches like Peter Rabbit hoeing, koi fish flags flying and metal hens that lay eggs make everything very me.

So we have St Patrick’s Day just round the corner – March 17 to be exact. Just like last year, there are no parades or mass gatherings. For me, it will be just like any other day, but I will still put up the flag and highlight my hair green for the fun of it and probably give the stove a rest and get a takeaway in tricolour. When I first started gardening, the teacher said I should plant first earlies (potatoes) by 17 March. Obedient student that I am, I have done so and they have sprouted.

I enjoy reading myths and legends of the land, and we can learn a thing or two from St Patrick, the man himself.

1.     Forgiveness

Patrick was kidnapped at the age of 16 and forced to work as a slave in Ireland. Imagine the trauma and the terror and the continual attempts to escape. Escape he did and the strange thing is instead of harbouring anger and unforgiveness towards those who stole 6 years of his freedom, he chose to ‘come and walk among the Irish’. He wrote,

 

I saw a man coming, as it were from Ireland. His name was Victoricus, and he carried many letters, and he gave me one of them. I read the heading: “The Voice of the Irish”. As I began the letter, I imagined in that moment that I heard the voice of those very people who were near the wood of Foclut, which is beside the western sea—and they cried out, as with one voice: “We appeal to you, to come and walk among us.

Marianne Williamson says: Unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die

 

2.     Stepping out

Patrick stepped out of his comfort zone. He could have chosen to remain in his safe and cozy home after his escape but he did not.  There is this innate fear or resistance to try new things. For as long as we are in lockdown, zoom is about the best gift ever for human interaction. Truth be told I never liked it initially, much less host a session. By now I’m virtually travelling across counties and countries via Zoom or Teams App and attending Spring classes or talks:– Craft  (Tipp and Galway) Dance (Kerry) Religion (Limerick) and Archaeology (Middle East)

3.     Team work makes the dream work

Patrick couldn’t have done it without his core group or supporters. He would have given up, burnt out even. Many establishments have collapsed and businesses have gone bankrupt during these times. In our home, Mike and I are a team – united in common interests, understanding and remembering that we are both human, warts and all. Communication is key because things unsaid and issues that are unresolved will never go away. And we are both unfinished canvasses and that’s wonderful as well because there is so much to learn and appreciate.

4.     It costs little to care

St Patrick was also a shepherd to the flock in Ireland, which grew exponentially in his lifetime and beyond. He was an evangelist, a missionary, and a pastor. For me at this time especially a phone call, a card, a present, a text or a prayer makes all the difference to a stranger, an acquaintance, a friend or a family member.

May the Strength of God guide us.
May the Power of God preserve us.
May the Wisdom of God instruct us.
May the Hand of God protect us.
May the Way of God direct us.
May the Shield of God defend us.
May the Angels of God guard us.
Against the snares of the evil one.

-        St Patrick, 433CE

 

Anam Ċara

I woke up this morning to grey skies and as I made my way downstairs I would usually stop halfway on the staircase and look at the sitting room. Himself was sitting by the fire (yes, the fire was blazing to dispel the morning cold) and he looked up and smiled. Same man, same chair, same fire, same sudoku puzzle in his hand. 

Routine and reliability in all its charm.

In 2008, I read a book called Anam Ċara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom by Irish author John O'Donohue. Anam Ċara refers to the Celtic concept of the "soul friend" in religion and spirituality. It is friendship that understands the heart. It describes a very specific and special relationship between any two people.

It is the small things and the big things that we recognise as expressions of care and support. 

In a very noisy world, we can miss that very easily: miss showing how and miss recognising the presence of it.

With the lockdown, the world doesn't seem so noisy any more. 

As we stay in our homes, we  can either numb our senses with the constant blaring of the television or we can pause to hear the dripping of the tap or watch the dog twitching in his sleep, because he is running off with a string of sausages and the butcher is hot at his heels.

I enjoy this extended period of quiet and no rush. There is  this occasional zoom craft class, or bible study class or dance class to break the momentum, and that is absolutely fine. Now that I don't have to drive so much, I seem to have more than 24 hours daily to sleep, to write, to read or to sew.

And I am not afraid to share my thoughts, my feelings, my passion, my stress with himself. 

However small or willy nilly they seem. Because I know there is a good listening ear which is  trying hard to understand why such a small thing would bother me. Because we are made differently. So by now, he is used to my random thoughts and my perception of things -  critical thinking , philosophy, ideologies, craft, cooking, gardening, fashion, parenting, books and everything else.

It is communication at non-verbal as well as verbal levels. 

By now he knows me so well to know what piques my interest. He will stop the car, I don't have to ask him, just for me to run down and take a photo of the spectacular Santa by the roadside.

A true soulmate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who tears down your walls and brings you to your own attention so you can change your life . - Elizabeth Gilbert

I don't know how many more weeks or months we have to be in this lockdown. But I am content to be with himself sitting by the fire. My source of comfort and trust.

My Anam Ċara.