IT'S ALL ABOUT THE OVER

As this season is officially the staying at home season, we stayed at home dutifully. No more running around, no more escapes to warmer climes. So day and night I tended to my garden. I sowed the seeds into plugs and put them in a vitopod heated propagator on February 26. There was great growth and I pricked them out, moving the stronger ones to trays. And then I watered and watched. If fact I watered, and watered and watered just because I was around. The inevitable happened. To my horror, some of them  gave up the ghost.

What had just happened?

In the past when we could go for short trips now and then, the plants were healthy and strong. There was space and time for them to grow, to be liberated. It was as if, knowing that the gardener was away, they rose in unison and clapped their hands, stretched out their roots to available water sources and reached for the sunlight.

So over caring had been disastrous. And you would think that there would be no harm in being overly concerned, after all it is in a gardener's nature.

When I think about the word 'over' I can find more words and phrases that have negative connotations rather than the positive: overeat, overweight, overdo, overdrive, over-the-top, overkill, overzealous, overdone, over-the-hill, it's all over, bending over backwards, fork something over...

So I purposefully search for words that bring about positive notes instead. Not an easy task though. I chose 4.

1. Overwhelmed
2. Over the moon
3. Over and above
4. Starting over with a clean slate

OVERWHELMED

I am always overwhelmed by the kindness of others. A family member or a good friend who would go  the extra mile just to bring some cheer into my life. I can always remember the time when I was in Primary School and had just recovered from fever.  In those days, public transport was not a reliable thing so my mother walked about a mile to the school just to make sure that I had some nourishing soup during recess time. And more recently, just when the Restricted Movement Order started in Malaysia, a friend asked whether she could do some food shopping for my son as he had not stocked up the fridge? And the random visit from a friend who would just ring the doorbell and say 'hey, I baked a cake for you?'

OVER THE MOON

Sometimes an old story is still very refreshing. I don't know how many times I have regaled the tale (to interested individuals, and only when asked)  of how Mike and myself reconnected after more than 30 years apart. Each time I tell it, it is as exciting as the first time we reconnected in 2008. I am still as pleased as punch and grinning from ear to ear.

OVER AND ABOVE

It is nothing like doing something to the best of your ability. I like the phrase over and above especially when I make something for someone. Because she/he is in my thoughts before, during and after  I have made a craft or baked something. There is so much pleasure in giving. The sparkle in the recipient's eye says everything.

It's also nice when there is an understanding that those living under the same roof should help each other. Whether or not they are working out of home.  Sesame street will call it COOPERATION. Over and above. The floor needs to be swept and cleaned. Pots and pans need to be washed. Clothes need to be hung out to dry and folded or ironed. The grass needs to be cut.  And it is not someone's job. It is everyone's responsibility.

STARTING OVER WITH A CLEAN SLATE

Now this is very difficult. But doable.

It takes great resolve to forgive someone else or to forgive yourself and start all over again. Some studies state that most people hold on to  bad memories more than good ones. Other researchers suggest it could be that good memories persist longer than bad, thus helping us to be more resilient.

Whichever theory, I want to remember more of happy memories. So what I do is to write down short notes about good, significant moments and stick them to a magnetic wall along the staircase. (for those who are interested: you'll need 4 coats of magnetic chalk paint for the wall). In that way, every time I feel sad, I just have to look at all the happy memories and my spirit is lifted again. 

Life is about living today. You can't go back to what things were. How you perceived they were. All you really have is now. 

Like Merida in Brave, I will take hold of my dream. I will ride, I will fly. I will chase the wind and touch the sky.